2003-06-06

RETRO-DIARY #3- Oh, the heartbreak- Oh, shut up!

Hello! I am in PA right now and smoking indoors! I went to the mall and bought a polka-dot dress! (don't look at me like that- it looks better than it sounds) I ate clams casino at happy hour! I am pleasantly buzzed right now! Yay! Except I keep bumping into stuff and knocking it over. I have all these bruises on my legs. I might look lepery in my dress. I'm too buzzed to care.

Anyway, I'm just visiting and having a grand old time here. Not much to write, so I figured now was a good time as any to post another RETRO-DIARY.

The two diary entries before this were holy-rolly stuff about the family and I criticized some of my aunts for being feminists - they so weren't, looking back. I'm way worse now. Anyway, they didn't have the umph of the Kehoe entries. They're like narratives describing my family from what I now know to be an extremely biased (and holy-rolly) point of view. Let's move on to the end of the affair. This is about two weeks after my last entry. Here we move on to pre-teen heart break. So crank up that Vanilla Ice, put on your Hypercolor shirt, and let the words take you back to:

8-17-91

Kevin dumped me yesterday. Everyone has their own view to why.

Sean, my bro. says "He's not into girls yet!" Yeah, Right he's gone out with alot of them.

Renee, my little cous says "I listened in on the phone when Dan [my cousin whose friend Kevin was] talked to him and he said 'I don't want to or feel like going out with a girl now' He said he still thinks you're pretty."

Dan says he just doesn't feel like going out with me.

I feel fat and ugly so I'm never going to eat unless I'm forced to. I'll crash a while. I want to call him and find out the real reason but I might be making him feel like a criminal. I still love him. I may be 13 but I have it bad.

And I feel so serious about him. I made so many plans. I thought during the school year I could go to a dance at his school or he could go to one at St. Laurence. [Wow. That's some serious stuff and stuff] By the way, I'm moving back [we'd been living in Cali through seventh grade. Came back to PA for summer and ended up staying. House hadn't sold anyway]. But that didn't keep me from crying all day yesterday! Oh, I still love him. [again with "Oh." Ugh!] When we went out I wondered what he saw in me. Now I wonder why he dumped me. I feel awful. I gotta go.

April

That's all for now- stay tuned for more heartbreak. I forget why I had to go. Maybe Dad was saying it was dinner time and I had to wipe away my preteen tears and put on a brave, so brave, face. OH- and in present day April's life, there is a possibility of some voice-over work- weeee! All that money I spent on the demo may possibly (maybe, hopefully, but let's not jinx it) pay off. Pray for me, people. I wasn't cut out to have an actual job.