2003-07-30

I am so homesick right now. I was watching some PBS restaurant thing and they went to this hot dog place in Jersey and I just miss the east coast so bad. Everything is so plastic and new and sterile in OC. I've hardly seen a bad hairdo or overly dark lipstick. Strangely, I miss seeing girls with their hail pulled back tight with gel and gigantor hoop earrings and extremely dark brown lipstick. I myself wouldn't wear such an ensemble after 1991, but they do and they keep on. Despite the changes in fashion, despite the fact that that lipstick isn't even being made anymore (and what will they do when their ten cases run out?), these girls plod on. Bravo, ladies. See, they don't care what's in style because they wear what they like- what they wore in high school. I do the same thing, except I let my hair hang lifelessly, wear jeans and black shirts, and never wear jewelry and rarely wear makeup. See, girls? I'm a rebel like you.

I'm sorry. Am I drunk.

Anyway, since I'm feeling so damn homesick, lets go back to a little suburb of Philly and the year 1991.

This is it. The after school special-esque moment you've all been waiting for: Preteen April's first period. So join her in this blessed event. Grab a yoohoo, kick back to Color Me Badd, throw on your Fila jacket, and, whoever you are, strap on a kotex in celebration, and let the words take you back to...

RETRO-DIARY#7- Girl, you'll be a woman...um, now.

9-2-91

I still love Kevin. I still don't know why he dumped me [Hey, Preteen April, can mid twenties April say something here? You are obsessing about a "relationship" lasted about two weeks, girl! I mean, the hell? And do you know he went on to be a manager at McDonalds and wore thick glasses?... Oh, well you couldn't know that then, could you? But, seriously, get over this, girl. You are making me so sick right now]. Nicky [then this is crossed out] Nikki still makes me feel like a baby. And she dumped Adam and is going out with Johnny now [and this is only the beginning]. Nikki and Carol and Colleen got drunk on vodka at Carol's 4 friend Slumber Party and I didn't drink [I probably should have- my first drunken binge happened later and turned out really bad. This might not have been so disastrous. Wait till you see what happens my first time- Ooooh, it's a treat]. It's so dumb and Nikki, Carol, and Colleen looked really dumb being drunk [To be fair, they didn't look too bright sober]. Alcohol isn't worth the trouble, parent trouble, and the hangovers. Carol's bro. Mike gave it to them and he got it from her big sister, Susan's liquer cabinet [does that count as a spelling error?- it would be liquor as vodka isn't sweet and flavory. Dammit! I am still a nerd!]. And now for good news and bad.

The good- Kevin may still like me, Dan said he might have stopped dating me cause his friends said, "Ew! You're dating her?" [I don't quite get why that's good news, but okay, Preteen April].

The bad- I felt sick all day today.

The newest news- I got my period the other night on the toilet. And I might have felt sick because of it. I use maxis now. God, the blood was all over the toilet. But I think the water made it seem like more blood. Nicki [another creative spelling of the name- and her real name was Sandra, too. Long story.]told the world about it which is embarrassing [Oh, shut up! You're glad she did so you didn't have to! You so wanted everyone to know you were a woman now]. Maybe now I'll get breasts and maybe a little taller. I'm so short! [I can tell you right now, there will be three more inches and that's all. And the breasts? Well, you're no Mae West, kid.] I'm sure I shouldn't babble on so. I must get my beauty rest.

Tah-Tah,

April

"Babble on so?" "Tah-tah?" Blech! What am I now? Dame Edna? Sheesh, April! You are seriously fudged up. Anyway, New and Improved April is still bravely staying away from waitressing (much to her bank account's displeasure). I'm going to be in LA from Friday to Monday. Friday I'm fairly sure I'm working American Dreams. Saturday is my Second City Orientation and this schmoozy party that Krazy K's friend is taking us to. Sunday is an audition to be one of the dancery people on American Dreams (I'm trying for the hell of it- I don't feel very confident about it as I cannot and never could dance, but I may as well). And Monday is my first Second City Class (Wheeeeeeee!!!). After that, I will look for a Non-Scary-Denny's job that works weekends. I still cringe when I think of it. The long shifts. The late-night trailer clientele. And the scary, new-age music makes me want to let flesh-eating insects tear through my eardrums. God, save me from it. Don't let me go back there.

What I did these last days:

-the kitchen is clean

-Grandpop's shirts are ironed

-sort of organized my room (sort of)

-got booked on Strong Medicine for Wednesday

-Um... the rest of the time I was looking up movie spoilers on Cinescape.

-Hey, shut up! I like to know what's in production and what's been cast. That's not even that nerdy.

-Don't give me that look! I have to do it for MY CAREER! It's like things I need to know to get forward in the business and... Oh, bugger off!