2005-10-21

Ok, not really.

I have decided that my new last name will be O'Randomirishnamy. So every past entry that had my actual last name will now have that. That way nobody else has my fake name (I know. I googled it). And no one can take my fake name away from me.

That other problem is a pen name. in the past, I favored Jacki Roman and Gillian Duffy. But Jackie Roman was too Jackie Collins-ish... Heh! French and Saunders. "Lucky Bitches." Heh.

Anyway, Gillian Duffy already belonged to an author... of cookbooks. Honestly.

So, still on the hunt for a delicious trashy novelist name. I think I should do the drag queen thing and take the first pet and first street I remember living on... Bonnie Baltimore. Meh.

Okay. Second street... Shnookers Sunshine. Blech!

Third... Whiskers Madison. Somehow I don't think they'll take me seriously.

Fourth... (taking my dad's bird as we weren't large pet people with my allergies) Georgy Tieree.

Mixup?

Bonnie Sunshine (film star of the silent era)

Bonnie Madison (muffin maker)

Bonnie Tieree (porn star)

Shnookers Baltimore (heiress to a shipping fortune)

Shnookers Madison (heiress to a tennis raquet-making empire)

Shnookers Tieree (stripper)

Whiskers Baltimore (pet name of fat man who smokes Cuban cigars)

Whiskers Sunshine (dancing cat-suited children's entertainer)

Whiskers Tieree (nickname for porn star Bonnie Tieree's famous body part)

Georgy Baltimore (chain-smoking theatrical agent)

Georgy Sunshine (chain-smoking porn director)

Georgy Madison (chain-smoking heiress to a porn dynasty)

Yup. Nothing in any of them, really. Unless, of course, I want people to think my pen name belongs to a porn star or an heiress or a million other things those names suit. So not me. So not even how I want people to think "Me, possible author of trashy novels" is.

So... Maybe some anagram of my real name. Could work on that. April can make Pilar or Lipra or Paril or. Damn it! Go to bed, April!!!

Fine, then. I will. Gosh!